October 2008 Archives

Pathetic 'Men' on the New York City Subway

An experience from October 7, 2008 by Shelomo Alfassa

"I am a fucking war hero!" he shouted into his cell phone as I entered the subway car. I had gotten on the B train in Midwood, Brooklyn at 9am and found myself seated to the right of a young woman quietly doing a crossword puzzle; she was flanked on her left by the screamer. He was a white 30-something disheveled man with salt and pepper hair tied in a scraggly looking pony tail. His tattooed hands held the cell phone that he continued to scream into, shouting about the police, the stock market, investing in Mexico, and how President Bush made him a murderer in Iraq. The car was crowded, and to the left of the man was an orthodox Jewish woman struggling to read The New York Times. The man was loud and obnoxious, but as the train went into the tunnel and his telephone conversation ended, he started to get very loud. He continued to shout and lean into passengers, especially the two women seated on his sides.

I watched the men on the train just sit there and watch the screamer. The daily variety was on board, black hated Jewish men, Russian men with sharp-toed gaudy shoes, Chinese men of the old and young variety, etc. Yet, not one person even lifted his eyes toward the screamer. The bizarre man was now 'getting in the face' of the two women. The woman to my left, who tried to imagine he wasn't there, had her personal space violated when the man put his soft drink bottle in her face and started to rant about something to her. I stood up, pointed to my seat and told the women to change places with me; by doing this I would be between her and him, and she enthusiastically advanced to the right. He didn't say anything to me, but then started to harass the Jewish woman to his left. I looked at the men around us, and even though he was shouting a tirade of paranoid ranting -- no men looked at him, no men did anything.

It was a pitiable moment, that none of these men even had the decency to look up at person who was making such a scene just a few feet in front of their faces. While the ranting continued, many women were looking scared, one fled. The men--nothing--they just put their noses in their newspapers or listed to their iPods and ignored it all. Disgusting. The train got to 7th Avenue and the man was leaning into the Jewish woman. The doors of the train were stuck open longer than usual, that was the moment. I stood up and told him in the most direct voice I posses, "STOP." "Get off the train now, you are disrupting everyone." Startled by the Jewish guy in the kippah, he shut up for a second and looked like he was thinking of what to do next. I didn't give him time to think and demanded in no uncertain terms "GET OFF THE TRAIN-GET OFF THE TRAIN NOW" while pointing to the door. He started complaining that the people on that train were crazy (you get the picture), and stood up and said "I ain't going nowhere, I am going to work with you people!" "GET OFF THE TRAIN" I demanded of him while motioning him toward the door. During this time, not one single man attempted to intervene, join me, nothing. They sat there and ignored it all, what pathetic sheep. It was especially shocking to me that when the orthodox Jewish woman was being essentially assaulted, the four Jews around me ignored her plight--sick!

The mad man stood up and said he was leaving; he became submissive yet demanded I shake his hand as he was a war hero. I shook it, very firmly, while gently tugging him toward the door. The train was stuck or something and the conductor walked by in a huff, his train was stuck with the doors open--but that was good for all of us. The shouting man left the train and stood on the platform making some kind of noise about wearing a "body cam" and that we were all under surveillance, and that his lawyers would be contacting us (especially me). A moment or two later the doors closed and the train departed. A 50-something black woman took the earphones out of her ears turned to me and loudly said "thank you" which brought about a general "thank you" from many other people, with about 6 or 7 of them clapping. The Jewish woman looked at me and through her facial expression expressed her relief and thanks, the crossword puzzle playing girl next to me, no more than 25, said "God bless you for helping me."

I don't know where the cops are when you need them, but we could have used one. The guy was near the point of needing to be restrained. The inaction on the part of the male subway riders - while this man greatly troubled the female passengers around them was pathetic. This was a serious situation and needed to be put to a halt. Shame Shame on those men on the train that stood by and put their heads in the dirt like an ostrich while their fellow human beings were being made to feel scared and defenseless. Shame Shame! I don't know who was more pathetic, the suspicious tattooed man who was shouting, leaning and putting fear into the passengers, or the ethnic assortment of pathetic 'men' who were nothing but sheep.

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